We all blame Meghan Markel for washing dirty linen in
public, but did she really? On the contrary, don’t you think that she spoke
about what she felt because her emotional intelligence was high enough to
understand the damage it was causing her wellbeing and mental health so she
knew when to quit?
When I talk to my friends outside Sri Lanka, they mention
that everyone in Lanka complain about heavy workload and high levels of stress
during lockdown and WFH period. Whereas many other developed countries take
well-being and mental health very seriously, while we don’t, and we use it to
our advantage with our peculiar mindset to think: “ah they must be sleeping
during afternoon without doing any work” or “these people don’t work from home,
let me load them with work’’ But is it the truth really? I’ve actually lost
count when people used to tell me “oh you work from home? Must be getting an
afternoon nap ah”
While we are made to believe that we are extremely lucky to
have our jobs during Covid, I have heard many incidents where employees quit
their jobs because their bosses couldn’t handle the organizational pressure
that came hand in hand with Covid19. Basically the bosses were being ‘Assholes”
so they had no choice but to quit. Which is an alarming sign, the ones who
realise the impact make decisions whereas the ones who don’t realise it will
release the pressure elsewhere, either on wives, children or take extreme
measures to end their lives.
We all like to think that our bosses are bullies sometimes.
But are they truly? Or are we over dramatizing ourselves because of our incompetency’s,
workload and personal drama. It is important to know if you are being bullied,
because the more unaware you are of it, the greater the impact will be on your
life, both physical wellbeing and mental health. Bullying doesn’t mean abusing
you verbally or physically, it also means shouting, belittling you, not giving
constructive criticism but ඔහේ
go
on criticizing without giving feedback, or withholding information from you to
do your job. Here are
few red flags that your boss might be a bully.
Your boss doesn’t offer constructive criticism. Instead of giving constructive feedback do they give useless,
meaningless feedback coming across as an insult, yes it is a red flag.
You are never appreciated. You know
your performer by hard work and you achieve your KPI’s but it is never enough,
instead of appreciating he chooses to belittle you and put you down or indicate
that you are not good enough.
Your boss only
focuses on revenue, not people. They don’t care if your career goals or
your personal growth, they only care about numbers and revenue. Yes it is a red
flag
Authority baby, he
wants to approve every single thing to the cent. All projects to minor
decisions has to be signed off and
approved by him.
You are asked to do
things outside your moral character. While these could be small requests,
but if it questions your integrity then it is a definite red flag.
You are expected to
figure things on your own. Your boss doesn’t guide you or give you
information to do your job, instead they blame it on you unnecessarily.
Your boss is
demeaning and rude. He yells or shouts for no reason, yes it is a big red
flag too.
What should you do about it?
Firstly identify, understand and accept that it is not you. Take
notes, evaluate the situation carefully. How toxic is it for you? Try and
evaluate and understand how much it affects you and your mental health. If they
makes you feel as if you are not good enough or that they always belittle you,
then cut the cord, and move out. Nothing it worth letting it affect your mental
wellbeing and sanity. How they treat you is their problem, not yours. Why should you become a victim? Once you
understand you have been bullied, speak to
someone about it. Speak to your
support system, get clarity, and speak to your HR.
When you finally learn that a person’s behavior has more to
do with their own internal struggle that it ever did with you, you learn grace.
Learn the lesson and gracefully bow out. If Meghan Markel left a palace after
all, you can leave a toxic workplace.
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